Woman goes viral on Reddit for refusing to pay her ex-husband for child care she no longer needs — or can afford

For many families, child care becomes one of the largest household expenses. As fees rise, parents must make difficult decisions to ensure their children receive high-quality, affordable child care.

A LendingTree study found that families who pay for child care spend an average of 18.6% of their income on it.

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A mother recently faced this financial reality after being placed on early leave due to a high-risk pregnancy. Previously, she and her ex-husband split the cost of caring for their daughter before and after school, balancing those expenses while both juggling demanding schedules.

Now that a new baby is on the way and she no longer needs childcare, she decides to cut costs. She told her ex-husband that she would no longer contribute to the costs, but he did not agree with the decision.

“He said she’s just as much my child and I’m still responsible for half of it even if I don’t use her on my days, but I disagree,” the mother wrote on Reddit.

While other Reddit users supported the mother’s decision to stop covering half of the costs, the core issue remained: child care costs can be a financial burden for families with dual-income parents.

The economic costs of childcare

For many working parents, childcare costs are unavoidable. Because they have 50% custody of their kindergarten-age daughter, both rely on day care services to accommodate their work schedules.

“Since her father and I both used the services equally (we share 50% custody), we split the cost in half,” the user wrote.

But high child care costs are no longer just a household expense – they are a growing economic burden that impacts the entire workforce. Matt Schulz, chief credit analyst at LendingTree, explained how costly and inaccessible child care options are forcing many parents to reduce their work hours or leave the workforce altogether.

According to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, an estimated 100,000 Americans were forced to stay home each month because they had no care for their children. That equates to $122 billion in annual losses in profits, productivity and sales.

Addressing this economic impact through more affordable child care options could help both families and the economy thrive.

Read more: Rich, young Americans are ditching the tumultuous stock market — here are the alternative assets they’re betting on instead

Cost-effective alternatives

As more companies recognize the importance of supporting working parents, employee retention and satisfaction through childcare benefits is in greater demand. A First Five Years Fund poll found that 89% of voters expect candidates to propose policies to help parents afford child care before the November 2024 election.

The conversation goes beyond finding immediate solutions; It’s about planning for long-term sustainability. This was a consistent theme in the replies to the mother’s Reddit post.

“You have to think longer term here,” wrote a user named VTMaid. “What’s the plan after your baby is born?” Do you expect to go back to work after maternity leave? Then what is the plan for the two children?”

These questions reflected the ongoing struggle parents face when they lack access to affordable child care. UPS recently tested this with a pilot program in which nearly 80% of eligible frontline employees utilized the new day care services, resulting in more than 120 fewer unplanned absences and a drop in turnover rates from 31% to just 4%.

However, not all companies can offer child care on site. However, many offer flexible spending accounts (FSAs) that allow employees to set aside up to $5,000 before taxes for child care costs in 2024.

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This article is for informational purposes only and should not be construed as advice. The provision is made without any guarantee.