Food drama involving home cooking skills lights up the internet

A Reddit user upset that his spouse refused to learn to cook or even acquire basic food preparation skills was not wrong to raise the issue, a family therapist and other users of the platform said.

“AITA because you disagree with my wife’s idea that she would never learn to cook?” a Reddit user named “Significant_Tree3606” asked this week in a post on the site “Am I the a–hole” ( AITA).

In the post, the person described a difficult marriage.

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“She believes she doesn’t have to help with cooking, preparing food, or cleaning up afterwards other than doing the dishes,” the poster said, despite the wife being a “very picky eater.”

This was partly due to the spouse’s upbringing, the author said, which included the need to do “no household chores” during childhood and to have a maid in the household.

“She never learned to cook and can’t boil water,” the Reddit poster wrote.

“Even though I accompany her, she just loses patience,” the author also said.

“She lasts about two minutes before she either walks away or throws a tantrum that she doesn’t want to learn and [that] I should be the only one [one] “Who can cook in this house,” the poster said.

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This came to a head the other night, the author said, when the non-cooking wife complained after a long week at work that the couple hadn’t spent enough time together that week.

“She lasts about two minutes before walking away or throwing a tantrum that she doesn’t want to learn.”

“I offered her to cook with me so she could learn and spend time together at the same time,” Significant_Tree3606 said. “I thought it would be cute to share a recipe that we make [had] never [eaten] before.”

That wasn’t well received, said the author.

“She had a seizure,” she said. The behavior continued throughout the evening after Significant_Tree3606 asked the spouse to clean a grill grate and put away spices, she said.

The Reddit user asked the woman (not pictured) to help cook dinner and the woman threw a “seizure” in response. (iStock)

“She eventually stopped screaming and complaining and put some things away. I gave her.” [a] “I ate a plate of food first to enjoy it since I had some cleaning to do,” the Reddit user said.

Aside from cooking, the author described herself as “the one who does the ‘handyman’ duties and takes care of all the bills and yard work,” but noted that the wife “does the dishes and puts away the laundry.”

The writer’s friends sided with her, saying they would not tolerate having a partner who demanded separate meals and refused to help in any meaningful way.

“It’s important for them to have an honest conversation.”

“Am I the right person if I want her to learn to cook and/or at least help prepare the kitchen?” she asked others.

One therapist told Fox News Digital there’s nothing wrong with letting your partner help in the kitchen, but “that’s surprising.” [the couple] “I didn’t address this issue before marriage.”

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“However, now that they are in this situation, it is important for them to have an honest conversation about household responsibilities and how they can divide the tasks in a way that makes them comfortable and avoids resentment,” says Rachel Goldberg, LMFT, founder of Rachel Goldberg Therapy in Los Angeles, told Fox News Digital via email.

If the stubborn wife continues to refuse to learn to cook, “they might come up with alternatives where she takes on other tasks to compensate,” Goldberg said.

A therapist told Fox News Digital that the couple in question (not pictured) should have “an honest conversation about household responsibilities” to avoid resentment and problems in the future. (iStock)

She also said the Reddit writer needed to acknowledge that the spouse “clearly doesn’t want to cook or learn to cook, and trying to change them won’t be productive,” she said. “Instead, they should focus on finding a compromise that works for both.”

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Additionally, the author may want to explore why her spouse “reacts so strongly to cooking.”

Goldberg said, “If she throws tantrums, there may be a deeper problem than simply never learning to cook or having a maid.” [while] grow up.”

“There could be a deeper problem than simply never learning to cook or having a maid as a child.”

“Understanding what lies behind her resentment could shed light on how she might make a different contribution.”

Reddit users largely agreed with the therapist’s perspective on the matter.

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The majority of the over 2,200 replies to the family drama said the Reddit user had a point in wanting her spouse to learn to cook.

Reddit users were very supportive of the cooking-themed poster. (iStock)

“You can’t make your wife grow up and act like an adult, but you can stop coddling her because she throws tantrums,” a Reddit user said in the top reply to the post.

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The same person said: “She needs to learn some basic life skills. What used to be sweet and quirky in a relationship quickly becomes boring.”

Another Redditor said, “She literally treats you like a maid.”

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The same commenter continued, “They do all the work while expecting her to sit and watch TV and she throws a tantrum when asked to lift a finger.”

The person added: “You’re not her wife – you’re her nanny.”

Fox News Digital reached out to the original Reddit poster for updates.