The pastor’s daughter speaks out after she was “sexually abused by him for years.”

A pastor’s daughter thought she had escaped a childhood of sexual abuse by moving out and getting married, only to watch her father break into her home and sodomize her weeks after her child was born.

Bertheophilus “Judge” Bailey, a respected pastor at St. Andrew Christian Church in Tulsa, began abusing Harmony Oates when she was in the sixth grade, according to court documents.

He told his daughter that he was her “friend” and that if the little girl ever revealed what he was doing to her, she would cause “total catastrophe for the entire kingdom of God.”

But on Wednesday he was arrested and charged with rape, child sexual abuse, incest, forcible sodomy and burglary after the 22-year-old concluded she had spent too long “in secret.”

“He left me broken and shattered, a shell of the person I could have been,” she wrote on Facebook. “And yet I refuse to let it define me.”

Bailey, 45, was arrested Wednesday and is being held on $500,000 bond on charges of rape, child sexual abuse, incest, forcible sodomy and burglary

Bailey, 45, had seen indecent assault charges against him dropped when he turned to his daughter in 2012.

And in 2013, he admitted a separate charge of child abuse against another of his children.

“At first he prayed for me, but as he prayed he touched me a lot,” Oates told kjrh.com.

“I knew how to set a boundary, but when he’s your father and when he’s a pastor and when he has that authority and a history, it’s like you say no, but what does your no mean?”

The assaults escalated and Bailey began raping his daughter after she turned 16 as she struggled to reconcile the public image of a loving father with the man who abused her.

“The thing is, when I was a child, I separated my father from who he was, I had to do it, that’s the only way I survived,” she said.

“I would just call him my best friend to hide the reality of my life.”

And she claims her father refused to give up his rule over her even after she fled the family home.

“In 2021, after she moved out, got married and had a child, the defendant came to her apartment unannounced, pushed her to the ground and forcibly performed oral sodomy on her,” the probable cause affidavit states.

“Following this incident, the defendant began coming to her apartment and looking in her windows.”

Oates said her father began abusing her when she was a sixth-grade student

She claims he warned her that if she ever revealed what he had done to her, she would bring about “utter catastrophe for the entire kingdom of God.”

The University of Oklahoma graduate describes himself as a “community servant” and “men’s recovery counselor” on his LinkedIn profile.

In 2018, he was employed as senior pastor at St. Andrew’s in north Tulsa

Oates confided first in her husband, then an older brother, and finally her mother Aricca before they confronted Bailey.

In a series of text messages included in the affidavit, the priest admitted his guilt and told his accusers: “I am an adulterer.” I am a child molester. I am a rapist.

In one case, he admitted to watching incest porn videos, adding that “the seeds of sin grow.”

He allegedly told them he felt entitled to have sex with his daughter because “it’s what people do.”

Bailey also allegedly admitted to abusing his daughter in conversations with his therapist and sent his wife an email exchange in which the counselor warned him that he was legally required to report the abuse to police.

“In the email chain, the defendant tells the therapist that he was aware of his legal obligation to report child abuse, but that he felt betrayed and thought it was safe to disclose this in therapy,” it says it in the affidavit.

Bailey, who describes himself as a “community minister” and “men’s recovery counselor” on his LinkedIn profile, is a graduate of the University of Oklahoma and has been senior pastor at St. Andrew’s since 2018.

His daughter went to the police in August 2023 and said on September 17 that she was ready to file a report.

“For too long I have suffered in silence, fearful of the consequences of speaking out against someone with so much influence and power,” she wrote on Facebook.

“The damage he has caused is immeasurable.” “It has poisoned my relationships, poisoned my mind,” she added.

“It has filled me with doubts, fears and a feeling of worthlessness that I have found difficult to overcome.”

“As a victim of sexual and psychological abuse at the hands of Pastor Bailey for over a decade, I feel compelled to warn others about his predatory behavior.”

“Despite his status as a respected member of the community, it is important to shed light on his actions to prevent further harm to unsuspecting individuals.”

The following day, the rest of her family issued a statement assuring her of their full support.

“You are a strong, intelligent and talented young woman,” they wrote.

“No one should ever have their trust and safety violated in such a horrific way, especially by their own father.”

“We are all very sorry that this happened to you.”

Oates and her mother Arrica went to the police after confronting Bailey about her abuse

Oates originally confided in her husband Malachi, with whom she has a young daughter

“Coming out of the darkness makes you a survivor,” she told kjrh.com. “I would say that.” “It feels like I’m no longer in the shadows.”

Bailey resigned from St. Andrew’s on Sept. 21 and has been held in the Tulsa County Jail on $500,000 bond since his arrest Wednesday.

Another of Bailey’s alleged victims has since come forward as Oates prepares to face her father in court.

“Think about a 13-year-old girl who doesn’t know who her true love is because her father says, ‘I’m your boyfriend,'” she said.

“I’m learning to trust God more and I know He has me and every other victim.”

“He has been with me throughout this journey and I know he will be there for me like a father, even if my father didn’t.”

“Coming out of the darkness makes you a survivor.” That’s what I would say.

“It feels like I’m no longer in the shadows.”